


Hard to Breathe

by Asterixa1313



Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: Post ch 240
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-07
Updated: 2018-05-07
Packaged: 2019-05-03 18:21:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14574855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Asterixa1313/pseuds/Asterixa1313
Summary: He Tian texts Guan Shan after he gets home from visiting his father in prison.





	Hard to Breathe

**Author's Note:**

> Not beta'd. Constructive criticism is welcome. I am really rusty. I hope y'all enjoy it anyway. 
> 
> Dedicated to call-me-ala on Tumblr. It was an idea taken from her headcanon post. :)

Mo Guan Shan couldn't think straight. His mind was all over the place and his breath was coming in unsteady gasps. His chest hurt and his palms were sweaty. He had finally seen his father after eight years and he didn't know what to do. How to think. Who to be angry with. If he even was angry anymore. He was confused and uneasy in his own skin. Seeing his father had made his chest constrict so tight he thought his heart would burst. He missed him so much. He just wanted him home. He didn't want to bear the weight of this much responsibility and stress anymore.

His mother had asked him on the way home if he was alright and the only thing he had managed was a shaky nod. Didn't trust his voice. Didn't trust his tongue not to break around the words. His cheeks still felt warm with lingering salt. His head felt stuffy and the soft skin of his eyelids raw. She had placed a kind, reassuring hand on his shoulder and said in her own voice, thick with unshed tears, "We're going to be okay Guan Shan" He tried his best to believe her. It was hard when he felt his whole world was breaking apart. Crumbling beneath the soles of his shoes. And he thought he wouldn't mind. He would just fall and let the earth engulf him whole.

His phone vibrated in his back pocket and he knew even before looking at it who it was.

_Mo Guan Shan~ Where were you today?_

Of course He Tian couldn’t leave him alone for one fucking day. Of course he wouldn’t be granted that luxury on the day he just wanted to curl up in his bed and go to sleep. He didn’t want to _think_.

 _Fuck off_ he replied. Perhaps hitting the screen a bit harder than necessary.

 _Let’s hang out~_ lit up his screen and the knowledge that He Tian had been staring at the chat box waiting for his reply flitted through Guan Shan’s brain. What was he supposed to _do_ with that.

He hesitated with a response. His fingers hovered over the keyboard on his screen. Did he want to see He Tian? He thought back to the night of the restaurant. After his panic attack which had been mortifying and left him feeling shaken for days afterwards. The feeling of his breath being stuck in his throat, trying to claw it’s way out of his lungs lingering in his subconscious. He remembered the feel of He Tian’s hand on the back of his nape. His palm broad and anchoring in its weight. His fingers soft and gentle as they curled around his neck. His thumb had brushed across his skin slowly. A mindless pattern that had steadily calmed his breathing and given him something to focus on. He Tian’s voice, deep and comforting as he had said, lips a ghosts touch against the shell of his ear, _I’m here_.

He was typing out a response before his brain caught up with what he was doing.

_Let’s go play basketball_

The response came seconds later and Guan Shan felt something soft and fond creep into his chest and around his heart

_I’ll meet you in ten~_

And Guan Shan was out the door.


End file.
